I am from Acre, but I write Gaza as my hometown on Facebook because of the nature of nomenclature. My village is not a kibbutz, my town is not Akko, my country is not Israel. I write Gaza as my hometown knowing full well the implications, the words, the rules. How the name Gaza compromises me. As a Gazan I’m a Palestinian reduction, a philistine, an animal, hostile, filthy, a terrorist, a nobody. I reject the rules that f orm the names, because they do not
fit. Those labels are all counterfeit and those outfits are made of bones, they’re tight and outworn. They prick. No, I am not a terrorist, but I’m terrified of all of it. I am not Gazan, and how lucky. I am free to go. My passport, palimpsest, cloaks, and me inside my invisibility. No 26-foot concrete wall to stop me, no ID checks, no check- points, I don’t need your crumbs, your faux sympathy . All I need is a desk and a chair, and these words to write me. I’m not filthy, and I never was, actually. I have access to clean water, and I make sure I use it. The water I bathe in is for one-time use only. How lucky. Zzz means sleep not an overhead drone, and whoosh is a skirt, not an F16 flying above me. I’ve never had to go on hunger strike to prove a point. I was never force-fed to stay alive, and you have yet to choke me. My troubles for the most part are existential not daily and I wonder why this makes me more of a somebody. How fucking lucky. I shall die once, not every day, and I do not need to worry that God cannot see me.